A uniquely awesome aspect of Barack Obama's upcoming move to the White House: the fact that his mother-in-law, Marian Robinson, might be moving in, too.
It will take more research than I have time for to figure out at what point in American history the nuclear family was elevated to most-desirable family system. I am guessing it has something to do with economics and the industrial revolution, but I don't know for sure. Either way, after spending years observing multigenerational families in India, I cannot help but think that we could benefit from modeling ourselves after those families. (Of course I'm not including the countless immigrant and African-American families and others who have already embraced this arrangement either out of choice or necessity.)
It seems to me we have unnecessarily shut ourselves off to a family structure that could provides countless benefits, including fill-in-the-gap child-rearing, social contact and a slew of other social and emotional safety nets. The prevailing pop-wisdom seems to associate such an arrangement with dependence rather than interdependence. I believe this is misguided. There are exceptions of course, but I would bet that they are just that: exceptions. And at some point before I have children and move them into my parents' basement, I'll back this up with empirical evidence.
8 years ago
2 comments:
Hear hear.
I have a 30-something friend from Africa who lives with her parents and her infant daughter. Upon hearing of this arrangement, another friend remarked, "She actually still lives with her parents?"
Yes, I replied, she does, just like most everyone else does in Asia, Africa and South America.
I can only dream about the added stability I would have had in my life as a child had my Grandma been under the same roof. To this day, one of my most cherished possessions, apart from Grandma's rosary beads, is the house key she gave me when I was 8 years old and my parents were locked in a nasty divorce/custody battle. "You've always got a place to stay when things get too difficult at home," she told me, pressing the key into my hand.
How wonderful that the new president's daughters will have their own grandma there with them every day! If only we could all be so fortunate.
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